So here I am, just creepin on my back porch smokin a sciggy.
I'm looking around my backyard, it's pitch black, but if you look up you can see the silhouettes of treetops creating a rigid line against the sky.
Intriguing, I know.
Anywho, I was thinking to myself.. I really can't see shit.
There could be some crazy critters or psycho serial killers just kickin it out there, ya know?
But I'm not scared. I wake up to this backyard every morning.
I find myself sitting in this same rocking chair almost everyday, in the same situation, staring at the same trees. So why would I be scared?
I trust where I am. I know this place.
That's when I started thinking.
Something some more people should try doing.
Anyways..
I started thinking, this is a lot like a relationship.
How you might ask? Keep reading.
I'm sure you've all found yourself in a relationship with someone where it's all rainbows and butterflies when you're together.. but once you're not it's like being in the dark.
You don't know what the other person's doing, who they're with, where they are.
It's too easy to lie these days. It's all about the trust. But everyone knows that.
No trust, no relationship.
Most people have their doubts bottled up in the back of their mind.
I do. And I'm bad about trying to find a reason to make those worries real.
Why I do that to myself, I don't know. But I'm working on it.
But back to my point..
When most people are afraid of the dark they turn on a light.
In a relationship everyone has their flashlight, but when do you know to turn it off?
When do you feel comfortable enough with a person to walk through the dark?
How do you know when you can trust someone enough to let them guide you even in the pitch black?
It's hard at first, always is.
But we've all done it.
I have a few times.
It's just getting to that point.
Giving someone your complete trust.
Looking someone in the eyes and being able to tell them everything.
Not worrying if it might be the truth but knowing it's the truth.
Sometimes I find myself thinking of every bad situation that could possibly happen.
Ya know, when you're by yourself and the only thing you have to do is think.
And then you find yourself thinking too much, too hard.
That's exactly what I was just doing and all of the sudden the most incredible thought I've had all night cam to mind.. to just stop.
The point is there is no way to ever know someone's every move, every thought, every conversation.
It's like one of the questions you'll never have an answer to, never a solution.
The only way to turn your flashlight off is to stop turning it on.
Trusting someone is scary. It's giving someone the potential to hurt you.
In reality everyone eventually hurts you in some sort of way, right?
It's finding the one's worth suffering for.
There are no guarantees, only risks.
But if you don't take those risks, how would you ever know?
In any situation, only oh wells and no what ifs.
